


Sing Me a Lullaby

by incurableinsanity



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drug Use, Drug Withdrawal, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-31
Updated: 2013-12-31
Packaged: 2018-01-06 20:38:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1111266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incurableinsanity/pseuds/incurableinsanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gokudera's life wasn't going through a rough patch, it was one. His life had gone awry since his was a young child, and it only went downhill from there. If he had been expecting any kind of end to the madness of his life, he certainly wouldn't have thought it to be a stuttering brunet with a beautiful smile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sing Me a Lullaby

**Author's Note:**

> Setting: KHR, Modern AU  
> Pairing: 5927/2759, minor 8018, mentions of others.  
> Genre: Romance  
> Point of View: Third-person  
> Warnings: Homosexual relationships, swearing, drug use, and possible OOC. Italics are typically flashbacks, thoughts, foreign words, sung words, or stressed words.  
> Further Notes: I really wanted to write a story where Gokudera owned a skateboard (no idea why), and then this came to be. AU entails that there's no mafia and its a normal life kind of thing. College setting, by the way, and its in a city. For a while, I stopped this when I couldn't think of a good plot, then decided on one and started it over again. I had to change plenty of things around, but I like it much better now. I've used excerpts of several song lyrics in this fic, and there is a complete list at the end.

"Gokudera, where have you been?"

Gokudera did not even glance up from his crouched position next to the alleyway. Instead, he took another long drag from his cigarette. He watched as the smoke rose into the air lazily, then finally replied, "Nowhere special."

"Ah, the bird guy again right?" The other said.

"Yes, the bird guy," The silveret snorted, turning his head towards the alley to his left. "So if you've come to me with more deals on weapons and drugs, leave. Hibari will kill me if I'm spotted with _you_ again."

"How rude," The other sighed, "I never could teach you manners."

"You can take those manners and shove them up your ass." Gokudera stood, putting the cigarette out on the sole of his worn sneakers. He promptly turned and walked away, ignoring the other's spoken words just as he dropped his skateboard onto the sidewalk,

"You can't avoid the drugs forever Gokudera. You'll be back soon. You always are."

* * *

Gokudera swore.

He was going to be late for the fifth time in a row (why the hell were the dorms so far away...). His university teacher was going to be mad; she hated having to wait for him. Who knew a music teacher could be that uptight (or maybe he was just too lax)? Growling, he kicked off the ground hard, gaining speed as he made his way down the sidewalk on the skateboard. He weaved in and out of people, making sure not to drop the notebooks he held.

Stupid idiots in alleys making him late.

He really didn't want to lose the credits. Taking extra classes would be annoying and troublesome, not to mention his teacher would be even stricter.

Though, that's what happened when one majored in music performance.

It was still weird when he thought about it. He was, technically, a delinquent after all.

Then again, his late mother had a big influence on him when he was young, teaching him piano before her fatal accident. His neglecting father and sadistic half-sister didn't really help him when growing up, so that probably led him to the person he was today.

But still. _A delinquent majoring in performance music._

A piano no less.

It made no sense no matter how many times he thought about it.

Though, he wouldn't be for long if he didn't hurry to his private lesson. His teacher was only slightly lenient with him, but told him if he kept showing up late, she would not give him the credits.

Five minutes to class.

He swerved around a corner, spotting the entrance to the Arts University, and nearly breathed a sigh of relief. He pushed off the ground once more, turning right into the campus. He stopped short, kicking up the board and tucked it under his arm. He sprinted into the building, then up the stairs to the second floor. Rounding the corner, he banged right into someone. He stumbled back but didn't fall, unlike the unfortunate person he just hit. He looked down, spotting a mess of gravity defying brown hair.

"Ah, sorry; my fault," Hayato said, holding out a hand. The person took the hand graciously, picking up the two books they dropped.

The person, male, just made eye contact and smiled. He shook his head slightly as if to say 'its alright.'

"Sorry, but I'm in a bit of a hurry. See you," Gokudera shot him an apologetic look, and then ran off to his classroom. He glanced back once, but the guy was already gone.

* * *

He was reprimanded for being a minute late, but his teacher let it pass when he told her he helped someone (a bit of a lie, only because he was the problem to begin with). He played a variety of pieces, all of them were contemporary this time around and one impromptu piece he made up on the spot. All the while she had corrected his posture a few times, and turned the pages for him. After about an hour and half, his lesson had ended, and she gave him a new ream of papers of the compositions for what seemed to be jazz music. He nodded, thanked her for the day, and left the classroom. He was already tapping out the rhythms with his right hand on his leg, engrossed in the music, when a light squeak alerted him to another's presence. He looked behind him to see the person from earlier, flushing red in embarrassment.

"U-uh," The teen stuttered, "S-s-s-sorry."

"What for?" Hayato asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I-I-I was l-l-listening to-to your mu-mu-music."

"Not really a reason to be sorry," The silveret muttered, mostly to himself, though he was sure the other heard it too. "Gokudera Hayato."

"I-I'm Sawada Tsunayoshi," Tsuna smiled. "N-n-nice meeting y-you."

"Ah, sure," Gokudera nodded. "You take classes here?"

"Y-yeah," Tsuna nodded. He opened his mouth, paused, but then added, "I-I major in vo-vocal mu-music."

"Music performance. You know, the piano," Hayato ignored the stuttering to the best of his ability; he needed to get going anyway. "Sorry, but I've got to get to my job. See you around."

"S-see you." He couldn't help but slightly mirror the smile he was given before heading off.

* * *

Hayato worked as a waiter, part-time, in a local diner. The patrons were decent, and there weren't always so many that it was a pain, and he did get nice tips every now and again from elderly women who felt bad for his financial situation (he had no idea how they knew, but he never decided to question it; he did think his manager might have something to do with it, however). Of course, there were still the ones who believed he was nothing but a delinquent and refused to be served by him, but he tried to ignore them, lest he break something and get his pay docked.

_Sure_ , he had a temper, and _sure_ , he liked to wear a lot of rings and necklaces, and _sure_ , he wore lots of punk styled clothing, and _okay_ , _fine_ he had silver hair, but it didn't make him a delinquent (and his hair was natural damn it!). Okay, so _maybe_ he got into a few fights when he was in high school, and he may have been involved with a gang for a short time when life got rough, but he didn't anymore. Okay? Damn... ( _alright, so he was still a little involved but no one needed to know, so shut it already!_ )

Sighing, Gokudera trudged up the stairs to the third floor or the dorm building (wedged between two commercial office buildings, unfortunately), and opened the door to his shared room. The dorm was decent sized, with a functional small kitchen, a small living room, a bathroom, and two bedrooms. Luckily, these dorm rooms were two per room, so he didn't deal with too many people.

"Oh, Gokudera, you're back!" His roommate, otherwise known as Yamamoto Takeshi, stepped out of his bedroom with a large grin.

"Baseball idiot," Hayato begrudgingly responded, dropping his books on the coffee table. Yamamoto was a big sports fanatic, much to his chagrin, and loved baseball the most, saying how he played in middle and high school. Still, the idiot was attending this university to major in game design, and wanted to make sports games in the future.

"Haha, how was work?" Yamamoto asked, laughing off the insult.

"Fine," The silveret grumbled, moving into the kitchen to find something to eat. "Where's Hibari?"

"In the bathroom," Takeshi answered. The bathroom door opened, revealing Hibari Kyouya (otherwise known as the baseball idiot's lover), who stepped out moments after.

"Herbivore," Hibari grunted as a greeting.

"Hibari," Gokudera sighed again. He wouldn't be lying if he said he had a _bit_ of respect towards the skylark. He was the one who got Gokudera out of the gang years ago (by destroying the gang, essentially, for breaking the peace; Hibari didn't know there were still remnants, and he didn't need to know either), and often checked up on him (claiming to make sure he wasn't heading back down the wrong path; well, ignorance was bliss, Hayato supposed), ultimately meeting Takeshi and becoming his lover a few months later (Hibari did not enroll in this university, and did not talk about where he studied, so Hayato's guess was as good as any). How that happened, Gokudera didn't want to know. "Is this a check-up or are you here for the Baseball Idiot?"

"The latter," Hibari said. "We're leaving, Takeshi."

"Okay!" Takeshi smiled. "See you later, Gokudera!"

"Yeah, yeah," Gokudera waved them off, watching them leave briefly before going about his way. He had papers to memorize.

* * *

Gokudera was surprised to see Tsunayoshi in his literature class. He sat in the back corner, attracting no attention whatsoever. Maybe that's why he had never noticed before. Regardless, Gokudera had nowhere else to sit today (jerks stole his regular seat...), so he decidedly sat next to Tsuna, who had been sketching small, random doodles in his notebook.

"Hey, Sawada," He greeted as he sat, giving the other a short wave. Tsuna jumped, turning to look at him. He smiled though, and replied,

"He-he-hello Gokudera-kun. Ju-just Tsuna is f-fine."

"Oh, alright then," Hayato nodded and amended, "Hey, Tsuna." This earned him another smile. "I didn't know you were in this class."

"A-ah, y-yeah," The brunet fidgeted, "I-I don't like a-attracting attention."

"I see that now," Hayato hummed and leaned back in his seat. "Are you nervous around me?"

"A-ah, so-sorry," Tsuna apologized with a sincere frown. "I-I'm not."

"Hm, okay," Gokudera looked down towards the chalkboard just as the professor walked in. He had to wonder why the teen beside him was stuttering then. As the class progressed, he couldn't help but watch the other discreetly. He'd be lying if he said the kid didn't interest him. He liked knowing things, and sometimes his curiosity got the best of him, so he couldn't help but do so. He tore half a page from his notebook and and wrote _"want to hang out after class?"_ before sliding it over to the brunet, who noticed it fairly quickly. After a few moments, the paper was slipped back and he read it.

_"Would you mind helping me with this class if we do? I'm confused here..."_ was what it said. Clicking his pen he replied,

_"Sure thing. I've read this book before."_

_"Fantastic. Thank you. It's nice out; want to study in the courtyard?"_ Hayato wrote an affirmative, and he saw Tsuna shoot him a small, grateful smile. He nodded in return, and turned his attention half-heartedly back to the professor's lecture. Well, it's not like tutoring him will be hard.

* * *

Hayato went to work with a half-smile on his face. Tsuna was a little hard to teach, but he got it soon enough when he had changed tactics on how to explain the reasoning for the father's choice to marry off his daughter. His student was relieved to finally have gotten it, and apparently was worrying over failing the class. Gokudera offered to tutor him whenever he needed (something of an impulse, but it was a little too late to change it), and Tsuna agreed, so they exchanged numbers. The only odd thing was that Tsuna had not stopped stuttering the whole time, but as long as he looked past it, it wasn't a huge problem. Maybe Tsuna was just a little shy or something. Well, whatever.

"You seem quite happy today, Gokudera-kun," His manager, Dino, smiled.

"Buy a new skateboard?" Haru, a fellow co-worker, guessed.

"Or did you find a new piece of music that you like?" Kyoko, another waitress, asked. Her brother, Ryohei, shouted from the kitchen his agreement to the question.

"Probably one-upped that Yamamoto boy again," Hana snorted.

"Nah, he probably is happy he isn't gonna be failed for being late so many times to his classes," Lambo, their youngest worker at seventeen, said.

"All of you should be quiet," Gokudera mumbled. He didn't even realize he was smiling.

"Oh, then it's probably a person you met! Love at first sight?" Haru perked up with a realization. Unsure of how to understand how she got the former part of her guess right, he just rolled his eyes and gave her a firm 'no.'

* * *

Once Hayato returned to his current residence, his phone buzzed, then buzzed again half a second later. He ignored it, however, when he entered his dorm to find Hibari sitting at the table, giving him a fierce look. Blinking, the silveret tilted his head in confusion.

"What's up, Hibari?"

" _Herbivore_ ," Hibari stood up and held up two cartons of cigarettes in a plastic bag, "Why are these under your bed?"

"You went through my bedroom?" Gokudera said incredulously, but he did have a hand-caught-in-the-cookie-jar look. Hibari's eyes narrowed. "...I'm trying, okay? I haven't even smoked in the past few days." The skylark didn't look convinced. It didn't help that it was a lie.

"Confiscated," the raven told him firmly, and his lips curled downwards. "Don't let me find these again."

"Yeah," He nodded, slowly, and Hibari opened his mouth to add something when Takeshi walked in, smiling broadly.

"Oh, hey guys! What's up?" Takeshi asked, oblivious. Hibari pocketed the nicotine sticks in his jacket before the other could see, and shook his head minutely.

"I'll be outside." He stated and left the room. The baseball lover looked confused, but shrugged.

"I'll be there in a minute," He called, heading to his room. Gokudera frowned, dropping himself at the small table, running his hands through his hair. It wasn't like he was having a hard time quitting. He just...got into these bouts of depression every now and again when he thought of his family too much or too many bad things happened at once. Smoking was the only release he had, but Hibari wanted him completely clean or he'd end up in jail like he was supposed to.

Shit.

Now he wanted to smoke.

( _no cigarettes, no money for them, no way of hiding them,_ his mind logically told him, but he fought it -

_The gang has some-_

_-too involved-_

_I can get something else-_

_-too risky, too involved-_

_Morphine is good. Morphine is definitely good-_

_-too noticeable. Enough already._ ).

Standing, he left the dorm, bypassing Hibari by taking the back way, and headed for the place he knew he could get them for cheap. His mind wandered along the way, until he remembered his phone had buzzed before he got to the dorm earlier. He slowed, pulling out the smartphone and unlocking it with a swipe of his index. He had two messages from Tsuna.

_'Hey Gokudera-kun, do you think you could come tutor me sometime tomorrow? I'm having trouble with a few math formulas.'_

_'Ah, only if you want to though! I'm not trying to force you!'_

The piano player stopped his walk, and his lips twitched upwards. He took a deep breath, exhaled slowly, and he quickly forgot what he was doing. His mind sighed in relief.

_'Sure, where do you want to meet?'_ He wrote, turning around to go back to the dorm. Tsuna suggested the university since he had class tomorrow, and Hayato agreed, since he wanted to use the piano to practice anyway.

* * *

As the weeks slowly passed by, Gokudera found himself spending more and more time with Tsuna at the university. He tutored the brunet nearly as much as they just chatted about anything. From music to television shows, and from roommates to books. He learned that Tsuna was living with his cousin, Reborn, while his older brother, Giotto, spent time in Italy to help out a close friend. Gokudera didn't mention much about his family (too many painful memories) but he told his friend ( _friend_ , well that was an odd word for him) that his late mother got him into piano, and his cousin was currently in Italy as well for work. Tsuna slowly stuttered less around him, but it never went fully away. If they were in a crowd, he would stutter more, but if he was just with Gokudera, it would lessen. The brunet never explained the stutter, and the silveret never talked about it, so they were fine with it.

Hayato frowned around his cigarette, watching the smoke curl towards the clouded sky. He was currently seated on the flat roof of his dorm building, wasting away his time. Hibari would kill him for sure if he was found out, but he could deal with it. It was, after all, the anniversary of his mother's death. He couldn't help the memories of her teaching him, him hearing about her death, never knowing she was his mother until he was eight, running away from home, so on and so forth. Tilting his head back, he felt the first drop of rain hit his face. More followed, turning from a drizzle into a downpour.

"Well this is just great," He mumbled, pulling the drenched nicotine stick from his lips, and let it join the others with the empty pack. His eyes closed, inadvertently shivering as he tried to ignore the pang of despair that hit his chest, and he inhaled deeply. "I'm going to be killed for smoking and catching a cold at this rate."

He laughed weakly as this, just as he began to feel his phone buzz. Then it buzzed again, then once more. He fished it out, realizing it was a call.

Tsuna was calling.

He nearly fumbled answering the call, "Hello?" He hoped his voice sounded as neutral as he intended it to be.

" _H-Hey, Gokudera-kun_ ," Tsuna answered. " _I hope I'm not in-interrupting an-anything._ "

"You're not. I was just passing time thinking," He said with a considerably steadier voice. Tsuna chuckled a bit nervously.

" _Anyway, d-do you think you could help me w-with so-something?_ "

"What is it?"

" _We-well, I need to practice a piece that goes a-along with a pi-piano, and I-I'm having with the pitch ch-change, so I thought tha-that you could play and I would be-be able to get it ri-right,_ " Tsuna responded, and after a brief pause, added on hastily, " _I-if it's not too much tr-tr-trouble_!"

He hesitated, looked at the cigarette, then the pack; there were five left. Five nicely packed cigarettes waiting oh-so-patiently to be smoked by him on the roof in the pouring rain.

Or there was the piano. And Tsuna. But mostly, the piano. Ebony and ivory keys waiting to be pressed by talented fingers, notes and silences artfully put together to create a melody that could soothe his frayed nerves, soothe the urge towards those waiting cigarettes.

"Did...you want to meet now?" He finally answered in what felt like an eternity, or perhaps it was just a second. He restlessly tapped his fingers on his knee.

" _I-If you're fr-free! I-it's okay if we do-do it another d-day_!"

"Now is fine. My classroom in twenty minutes?"

" _Y-yeah! O-okay! See you then_!"

"See you," Hayato hung up and looked at the cigarettes. Twenty minutes was enough to smoke them all, then he wouldn't have to hide them, wouldn't have Hibari finding them.

In twenty minutes, he'd have enough time to shower, get changed into something dry, get to the campus with an umbrella, not catch a cold, not look odd in front of Tsuna.

Twenty minutes. Cigarettes or shower?

Relief or normality...?

After a brief moment, Hayato stood, taking the carton and stalking back into the building, tossing the object in the trash. He headed for his room to shower.

* * *

Twenty minutes passed, and Hayato was waiting outside the classroom for Tsuna, fidgeting restlessly. His hands itched for the pack he discarded in the dormitory building. He exhaled deeply, attempting to calm himself.

"G-Gokudera-kun, so-sorry to ma-make you wait!" Tsuna called, running up in a hurry, clutching papers.

"It's fine," the silveret told him.

"Bu-but, I-I was the o-one who as-asked you to come he-here a-and-"

"Don't worry about it," Gokudera cut off the rambling, causing Tsuna to flush. "I had nothing better to do."

"A-alright," The brunet nodded finally, smiling. "He-here."

"Let's head in," The delinquent opened the classroom door, taking the offered sheet papers. He looked over the sheets, reading it. The lyrics were in English, a rock song that used the piano, but not completely; this was the complete piano version. Luckily, "I've played this before, so it should be okay."

"Th-thank goodness." Tsuna sighed in relief. Hayato took a seat at the stand up piano, placing the sheets in a proper position as Tsuna looked at some papers of his own. He hesitantly placed his hands on the keys, testing a few and adjusting his posture.

"Whenever you're ready," He told the other.

"Re-ready." He pressed the first few keys, easily slipping into a more relaxed state.

" _Hey, may all my feelings go unsung- and our mistakes die while we're young...Why are we so afraid to lay the blame...?_ " Tsuna's voice carried throughout the music room, gentle yet firm, nervous yet relaxed. Hayato watched him from the corner of his eye, noting the slight nervousness, but otherwise, Tsuna looked happy to be singing. The piece was over within minutes, and Tsuna looked over at him gratefully.

"T-thank you, Go-Gokudera-kun." Tsuna smiled brightly, "I think I got it n-now."

"No problem," He responded, though his face flushed, abashed at the thanks.

"Wo-would you mind if we did it a fe-few more ti-times?" He shook his head, and Tsuna smiled even wider.

They went over the piece five more times, Tsuna continuously thanked him, said he would repay the other somehow, and it wasn't until Hayato was nearly back at the dorms did he realize that not once had Tsuna stuttered when he sung.

* * *

"Hibari!"

Yamamoto had shouted when Gokudera was thrown up against the wall. He glared at Hibari just as his collar was roughly grabbed.

"Herbivore," Hibari snarled, "What did I tell you?"

"I haven't done anything!"

"I found _them_ in the trash!"

"How do you know they're mine?" He bit out defensively.

"Hibari! Gokudera! What's going on?" Takeshi asked, clueless to the whole situation. Gokudera glanced over at the other, then back to Hibari. If only the skylark was that oblivious.

"I'm not stupid, herbivore. No one else in the dorm smokes," Hibari harshly whispered. "If I catch you again, I will send you to jail this time." With one last hit to the stomach, Hibari released him, and he fell to the ground, clutching his aching abdomen. Hibari left without another word, and torn between to who to go to, Yamamoto sent him one extremely concerned look before running after the skylark.

_Shit. Shit. Shit._ Gokudera growled out, "Shit!"

He should have smoked the damn things, cold be damned. Should of disposed of them elsewhere. Should of...should of...

Should of never accepted Tsuna's proposal. Should of never gone to this college. Should of never pursued piano. Should of never gone to the gang's hideout that day when Hibari destroyed it. Should of stayed home in the dingy apartment.

_Should of, should of, should of._

Maybe it was time to disappear again. He could somehow make it back to Italy. Hitchhike, stowaway. Something.

Perhaps he would just get back into his gang. Go into hiding with them. Stay low, away from Hibari, away from Yamamoto, co-workers, and Tsuna.

He needed a quiet place to think. He wanted something to calm him.

_You know what the gang has,_ his mind whispered. _Just go back. It'll be okay._

_No, I can't._

_Why? No one cares about you. Hibari's threatening you.  
_

_He just wants me to stop._

_Yamamoto doesn't even understand you._

_He's just naive and gullible, and he's out of the loop._

_Tsuna's too scared to even talk to you without stuttering._

_He's probably just shy._

_C'mon, you know no one needs you here. No one would notice your absence; they'd all forget eventually. It'll be easy as one, two, three._

Hayato whined unintelligibly, gripping at the roots of his hair tightly. He couldn't think straight like this. He had smoked too many and his body was aching for more of the nicotine. It made him shake, made him jumpy, made him anxious. He hated being anxious. His entire body shook, he felt too light-headed. He couldn't breathe.

He needed to _get out, get out, get out._

He jumped up, threw the room door open, and ran off blindly, absently hearing the door shut loudly. He couldn't even tell where he was going; he just wanted to get away. He just wanted somewhere to go, to stop and think. He needed a place to breathe.

He didn't even realize when he stopped, falling into someone's arms.

"I told you, Gokudera. You always come back," Someone said and he saw black.

* * *

Hayato really couldn't even tell how the next few days went by. He shut his phone off and disassembled it so he couldn't be tracked to this place. He knew where he was: the gang's newest hideout- an abandoned underground club. He probably would be killed for this if he was found.

He couldn't find it in him to care.

Morphine was good like that.

That, and cigarettes. He glanced wearily at the one perched precariously between two fingers, smoke rising lazily into the air.

"You know, Gokudera, ever since you came over here, you've been awfully quiet." His eyes flicked to the left, noting the visitor.

"Hey, Fran," He spoke and nodded slightly. "I wonder if you can say the same."

"I talk," Fran stated in that monotonous voice that typically riled everyone up.

"Hm. What do you want?"

"Well, I just thought I'd inform you that Leader- _san_ is back." The two glanced over, spotting the boss walk into the room. He was flanked by two others.

"Well, well, well, I see my favorite pianist is back," Byakuran chuckled.

"O-ho, what a surprise," Kikyo smiled and Zakuro, beside him, snorted.

"Idjit, it's hardly a surprise. He always comes back even though the idjit always claims he'll leave for good."

"Well, whatever. It's nice to have you back, Gokudera," Byakuran smiled (the silveret hated that smile) and turned to leave the room. His followers joined him.

"Leader- _san_ always gives me the creeps," Fran stated.

"Agreed..." Gokudera sighed, and put the cigarette to his lips. "Anything else?"

"Nope," Fran turned and walked away.

Finally, alone again.

* * *

It was another week (though, to Gokudera, it didn't feel so long) until the police barged in as a drug bust. Gokudera fled the scene quickly and quietly, and attempted to leave no trace of him behind. He wasn't sure if he did a decent enough job in five seconds though.

As it turned out, Fran was an undercover cop and had been informing the police of all the activities. While he was escaping, Hayato thought he saw Hibari in the crowd, but it was too quick to be sure.

He sincerely hoped that if it was, he wasn't spotted.

He really, really did hope, even through his drug-hazed mind.

He ducked and weaved through alleyways, even through the pouring rain. He had no idea where he was going; he just wanted to get away as quickly as possible. He stopped short, breathing heavily. He didn't entirely recognize the area, even though the drug had worn off by now. He swallowed harshly, trying to think his next move.

Quickly, and without warning, his legs gave out, causing him to fall and sit against the brick wall. He shook slightly due to the cold and wet weather, and he grasped his elbows tightly.

Where could he go? He didn't have a place to return to.

Hibari would find him back at the dorms. Hibari knew all the people he worked with, and the teachers he had. He couldn't go to anyone. Hibari knew everyone he knew.

Italy? Should he go back to Italy? Surely, the skylark wouldn't track him all the way there, right?

"Go-Gokudera-kun?" His gaze slid over to meet worried chocolate eyes. "What ha-ha-happened?"

Well, almost everyone.

* * *

"He-here," Tsuna passed him a soft blanket, to which he gripped tightly.

"Thanks..." Gokudera murmured, placing it over his lap. Tsuna's cousin's (Reborn, if he remembered correctly) apartment was decently nice looking and well-sized. Reborn had been there momentarily, gave a once-over look at Gokudera, and then informed Tsuna that he would be back later so have dinner ready around seven or so. Tsuna had smiled and wished him a safe trip before turning his attention towards the silveret.

Tsuna never once mentioned how worried he probably was when he lost contact with him nor asked him what he had been doing in that time.

"Reborn se-seems to like yo-you," Tsuna smiled conversationally, sitting next to him. Gokudera had been allowed to borrow Reborn's clothes, as Tsuna's were too small for him.

"How could you tell?" He couldn't help but ask, resting his head on the back of the couch. He felt exhausted. He just wanted to sleep forever. He didn't want to face the consequences of his actions.

"He let you st-stay with me a-alone, which is sa-saying something," Tsuna answered, oblivious to his inner turmoil. "He do-doesn't like co-company very much, a-and is wary of pe-people I meet."

"How come?" Gokudera asked without thinking, and so quickly added, "you don't have to answer that."

"It's o-okay. It's because I-I stutter...a lot. So-so, he thinks pe-people will be a-annoyed with me quickly and hurt me."

"I have wondered, and you don't have to answer this either, why do you stutter so much? It's not really a problem; I'm just curious." It seemed like a good time to ask, and he couldn't help the fact his brain was lacking a filter at the moment due to exhaustion.

"It's a spe-speech disorder. I-I've had it, uhm, since I was yo-young." Tsuna answered, flushed, maybe embarrassed.

"What about speech therapy?"

"It he-helped a bit. It-It used to be-be a lot worse. Bu-but it doesn't anymore."

"Hm...that reminds me, you don't stammer when you sing."

"Y-yeah. It was re-recommended that I ta-take up singing because it in-increases fluency. I do-don't stutter when I si-sing anymore."

"If stuttering bothers you, then why not just sing all the time?"

"Wh-wh-wh-what?" Tsuna's eyebrows shot up in a deeply surprised expression.

"I'm not saying you have to sing high and low notes like an actual song," Hayato answered quickly, gesturing with his hands slightly. "Like, you know when people talk in a sing-song voice? That kind of thing. I think. It's hard to explain."

Tsuna stared at him for a few moments before smiling a bit. " _You mean like this?_ " It sounded as if Tsuna was singing a lullaby, but not entirely. Just enough to change the pitch of his voice along with the words.

"Exactly like that!" Gokudera grinned. "You don't have to do it all the time. I don't mind when you stutter around me, but if you're uncomfortable with larger groups, maybe you could do that instead!"

"I-I never re-really thought about tha-at. Th-thank you, Gokudera-kun," Tsuna smiled, blushing a light pink shade, perhaps from embarrassment.

"No need," He said quickly as heat rose to his face. It really wasn't often he was thanked and it was truly meant. "Anyway, what's for dinner?"

* * *

When he woke in the middle of the night, Hayato knew his withdrawal symptoms were beginning. He shifted and turned multiple times on the couch but to no avail: he couldn't fall back asleep and wait it out. He sat up, sweating despite the cool temperature.

_Idiot, idiot, idiot,_ he told himself.

_Just had to go and use morphine._

_This happens every damn time you go ahead and get sucked back into drug use._

_You hate it and swear to never do it again, yet here you are._

"Shit," He swore softly. He bounced his leg on the carpeted flooring, hoping to ease up some of the tension. He knew it was going to get worse. Much, much worse. His early symptoms appeared slowly, but his late ones always tried to slam into him all at once.

He really did not want to have to vomit. It was gross, and this was someone else's home, and was Tsuna going to think any less of him if he started upchucking in his bathroom at four thirty in the morning? Tsuna would surely be worried and he'd have to confess about his usage, and he'd probably get kicked out by either Tsuna (less likely) or Reborn (more likely, considering the elder's temperamental and protective nature) and then he'd really have to find somewhere to go.

His half-sister and father were right. They said he would never amount to anything. They said it would be best if he just stayed home, _tried_ to do good in the family business, and forget about his dead mother as if she never existed.

_"Hayato, these hands were meant to play beautiful songs."_

_"Hayato, your mom is dead. Oh well, I guess that means I can spend more time getting you to taste test my cooking recipes."_

_"Shut up, and go elsewhere. You're taking up too much air in this room."_

The silveret bent in on himself, gripping at the roots of his hair painfully as tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. Damn it, damn it, damn it! He hated having to think about the past. He hated thinking about his poor choices. He hated thinking about being alone. He hated thinking. Why did he always get stuck thinking when he couldn't sleep. He just couldn't do anything else.

"G-Gokudera-kun?" His head shot up quickly, almost painfully, to see Tsuna standing by one of the windows, illuminated by the moonlight. "Are y-you okay?"

"Uh." He felt like a deer caught in headlights. He swiftly rubbed away tears and ignored his aching fingers and wrist. "Yeah. I'm alright. What are you doing up?"

"I-I had to use the b-bathroom. Are you sure you're o-okay?" Tsuna went ahead and sat down next to him. The brunet looked to be contemplating something, as if he had superhuman instincts able to sense his distress.

"U-uh," Hayato intelligibly answered. He had a choice. Tell the truth, risk being thrown out, and being alone, or tell a lie, pretend he just had a bad dream, and pretend he caught a virus when he inevitably began vomiting in a few hours.

His mind argued to lie. His heart wanted to tell the truth, to set him free.

In a split second decision, one force won.

"No...I'm not," He sighed, leaning back against the couch. Tsuna glanced at him, questioningly but not pursuing it, as if to let him choose what to tell the other and what to keep to himself. Gokudera felt that with all the honesty he was given earlier, he could return the favor...maybe. "I, uh, I am bad person, Tsuna."

"Why do-do you say that?"

"I...when I was younger, I used to live in Italy with my father and half-sister. My mother was my piano teacher, but I didn't know that at the time. One day, when I was three or four, she passed away-" if Tsuna wondered what this story had to do with his earlier statement, he did not press- "and then my family's attitude kind of changed. I mean, before, some servants at my father's home kind of treated me rudely, but it all got worse. My half-sister became obsessed with giving me bad cooking, and my father was intent on ignoring me."

Tsuna frowned.

"One day, I had enough. I was eight years old and heard the servants talking about my mother, and I learned the truth. I had to get out. I left with nothing but my clothes and a bit of cash. It was hard trying to find somewhere I could settle down and live, and I somehow found my way into this gang when I managed to smuggle myself into Japan. We were bad, and I wasn't the best person either; I had enrolled in the local high school, but I got into a lot of fights. Anyway, The gang specialized in drug and gun trafficking. I ended up depressed most days, and had bad anxiety on others, so they introduced me to morphine."

Tsuna's eyes widened noticeably, but he remained silent.

"It was bad, and I knew it was, but I couldn't help it. I...really became addicted to it and was really happy when I smoked cigarettes too. I think it went on for a few years. Then one day, this crazy ass guy a bit older than us named Hibari crashes the front door. He says he was going to bite the gang to death and brandished a pair of tonfas. We all thought he was on drugs, but he wasn't, and he completely thrashed every single one of us. Yet, he took one look at me, and gave me an ultimatum: become completely clean and start over, or go to jail. It was obvious which one I picked."

His companion was ready to say something, but Gokudera continued anyway. His story was not over yet.

"I enrolled in the university, and quit smoking. I met my roommate, who's this idiotic baseball crazed moron but was still the first person I could talk to without worrying about being shot or injected with drugs or being hit by a tonfa. Hibari got me this job at a diner, and all the workers are super nice and really don't seem to care about my background, and definitely worry about my well-being. But I'm still being a bad person. I still smoked behind Hibari's back because my depression would return around my mother's death date and my anxiety would skyrocket for no reason."

Tsuna waited as he took a deep breath and spoke once more, oblivious to the tears reforming in his eyes.

"So, you see, I would always say that I would leave the gang - which hadn't been destroyed completely - and they always laughed and said I was going to come back again one day. And the worst thing is that they were right. I would smoke and run out of cigarettes and go to them for more, or I would go to them for morphine so I could stop caring about everything, and it never ended."

Tsuna opened his mouth, but once again, he was cut off.

"I always promised to stop when I would go through withdrawal symptoms but I don't, and Hibari caught me a week or a two ago and I had an anxiety attack and ran off back to the gang and I got dependent on morphine again, but just earlier today the police performed a bust on them and now I'm going to go through these symptoms again and I'm going to have to face consequences I knew were going to happen but didn't care about and, and I'm just a bad person and I don't deserve to be friends with you and I don't deserve to be here and I'm such a bad person and I just can't-"

"G-Gokudera-kun," Tsuna placed his hand over the crying silveret's mouth. This effectively silenced the teen, who looked towards the suddenly determined brunet in surprise. "Gokudera-kun, the p-past is the past. What ma-matters is what happens next. Do you w-want to get better?"

Gokuder nodded.

"D-do you want to have a n-normal life?"

Again, he nodded.

"D-do you want to remain f-friends with me?"

Stunned, Hayato stared before squeezing his eyes shut and nodding firmly. He felt Tsuna remove his hand and wipe away stray tears gently. He could hear the smile in his voice in the next sentence,

"Good. Me t-too." There was a brief pause and then, "Gokudera-kun, when you a-are all recovered, w-we are going to see y-your roommate, and your c-co-workers, and this Hi-Hibari person. You are going to a-apologize for w-worrying them sick, because it's been forever si-since they probably heard fr-from you, and then y-you will promise Hibari that you will f-face the consequences of your a-actions and get b-better like you want to. Okay?"

"...Okay..." Hayato whispered, opening his eyes.

"Good," Tsuna smiled once more. The depressing moment had passed, and Gokudera realized, with some extent of his observational skills, that this was what it was like to really have a friend.

The next few hours passed in a bit of a blur. Reborn woke up somewhere around eight-thirty and left to go to work. The fedora-wearer never said anything that hinted to him hearing the conversation in the darker hours of the morning, only said what time he would be back. Tsuna made them breakfast, and Gokudera had managed his way into the kitchen despite his aching legs. His sweating during that time had neither become worse nor better, but he still felt gross as such. Tsuna turned on a plug-in fan for him to sit in front of as they passed the time just talking. At one point, they shortly played video games together, but Gokudera lost quickly each round and didn't want to throw a controller in his increased anger, so he settled for watching the brunet play (who also, upon learning in conversation, did not have class today, luckily).

"G-Gokudera-kun!" Tsuna shouted in worry when the silveret suddenly shot up and ran for the bathroom. Hayato's stomach felt like it was going through a wind tunnel and then on a roller-coaster full of loops. He made it to the toilet just in time to empty his stomach contents. He knelt down in front of the toilet, pressing his head against the cool porcelain, and belatedly realized five minutes later that Tsuna was rubbing gentle circles onto his back. He took deep breaths, attempting to ease his queasy stomach. A few minutes later, he felt okay enough to lift his head to look at the brunet.

"S-sorry," He choked.

"W-what for? I j-just want to make su-sure you'll get better," Tsuna smiled a bit, pushing a piece of silver hair behind one of his pierced ears. "Is your s-stomach okay?"

"It's better," He managed to say. He took Tsuna's offered hand as the other stood, and the two made their way back to the living room. He throat burned and his eyes were watered from the event he unfortunately experienced, but he hoped that was the only time he would vomit during this period. As soon as he sat, however, he felt his abdomen cramp up painfully, and he cried out in surprise. He leaned forward, wrapping his arms around his stomach in false hopes that it would help. He shivered despite his current body temperature, feeling goose bumps appear on his arms instantly that didn't seem likely to fade. Tsuna looked at him worriedly.

"Is there a-anything I can do to-to help?" He asked softly, crouching in front of the other, and placing hands on jean-covered knees.

"I-I don't know," Gokudera shook his head, willing away tears even as he shook. He stifled a groan at a sudden pang of pain. "I usually just bear through it...through it alone."

"Is there a way y-you could sleep it off? W-what about pain me-medication?"

"C-could never fall back asleep. M-meds didn't work." Tsuna frowned in deep worry, and Gokudera breathed deeply and tried to shift to help ease the cramping. It wasn't working. He watched as Tsuna moved and sat down on the couch, and then pulled him down so his head was resting on the other's lap.

"I-I'll sing you to sleep."

"Eh?" Hayato blinked as he shifted again to bring his legs up onto the couch and straighten himself out. He managed a glance at the brunet before squeezing his eyes closed when pain shot through him again.

"I-I'll sing you a lullaby. It'll help you sleep. M-my mom used to si-sing this to me when I couldn't sleep." Gokudera could hardly even protest to this kind of treatment even if he wanted to. "Ju-just try to relax, okay?"

_Kind of impossible_ , he thought. but nodded all the same.

" _A gray starling, a turtledove, a Japanese gold beetle, ...and a giant purple butterfly, all in a dream. The evening primrose can't sleep, because it drank the silver drop..._ "

Hayato focused on the words, slowly attempting to relax a few of his muscles. Tsuna began carding a hand through his hair in a soothing manner.

" _A dream, dream, no dream...Voices of the night... If you traverse the forest...A dream, dream, no dream...Goodnight, my darling child. When you wake up tomorrow, I'll give to you: a raspberry, a summer oleaster, and a dogwood..._ "

He was strangely reminded of his mother, when she would hum along with the piano as she pressed keys in perfect melodies, creating harmony with just a few movements. He never failed to relax and smile during the times she played the piano and she smiled along with him.

" _A day lily, a yellow lily, a screech owl. Staying up late: a wild rabbit, a tiger finch. A baby lizard without a tail...In its place, a dragon jewel..._ "

Without even realizing it, Hayato dozed off to the soft singing of the other person in the room...

* * *

When Gokudera woke, his head was still resting in the brunet's lap. A blanket had been pulled up up his shoulders, and a quick glance upwards showed that his friend and savior had fallen asleep. Carefully, he looked to the time to see that it had been nearly eight hours (it was currently ten o'clock at night). His friend had really helped him, he thought.

_But he's not really just a friend, is he_ , his mind supplied. He couldn't be, really, Gokudera reasoned to himself. In the short time he got to know Tsuna, they had really gotten close, even before this whole fiasco. Hayato might have been feeling something, but he certainly didn't expect it to be romantic feelings towards the singer.

It _did_ make sense, however. He didn't even realize that he loved Tsuna until just now. Even before this, the brunet had really made him a happier person and he adored every single one of Tsuna's characteristics, stammer and all.

He quietly sat up, glancing around the dark room, only to see the kitchen lights dimmed. He squinted, spotting Reborn in there, who then turned to make eye contact. He froze for a brief moment, but quickly and silently got off the couch when he was beckoned over.

"So," Reborn drawled, bringing a cup of espresso to his lips as he looked over the brunet. "I know what you've been up to this past week. When Tsuna asked me to look for his first friend, I didn't expect this friend to be doing something so dangerous."

Gokudera jumped at this, and hastened to bow lowly. "Ri-right. I'm sure you don't approve so I will quickly make my exit of this apartment and never talk to Tsuna again is that is what you want. I should take responsibility for my actions, and if this is it, then so be it. I deeply regret all of my actions, but no matter how much I am sorry, it won't mean a thing if I don't take responsibility."

Reborn sighed, "Lift your head, boy." He did as told, looking at the elder, confused. "If you are no longer friends with Dame-Tsuna, I suspect he will be upset that he lost his friend. I can see how much you mean to him and vice versa," Reborn stopped to take a quick sip, "Therefore, do not leave. I will allow you two to remain friends, or whatever. However, if I catch you doing anything of that kind, you will have to answer to me, got it?"

"Got it," Gokudera nodded quickly. He couldn't believe that he was still allowed to be here, even after all his idiotic stunts. "I won't do it again."

"Good." Reborn nodded shortly. "One more thing."

"Yes?" With three long steps, Reborn stood in front of him and not-quite-harshly hit Gokudera on thee head with the back of his fist. The teen mumbled a small 'ouch.'

"That was for worrying Dame-Tsuna. Now go get some rest; it's late." Reborn placed his empty cup into the sink and then left the kitchen. Not wanting to disobey the other, Hayato shut the lights in the kitchen and rejoined Tsuna at the couch to rest once more.

* * *

Two days came and went, and Gokudera finally had to return to the dormitory to face some of those he worried. He fidgeted nervously on his way up despite Tsuna's hand holding his for support. He looked back, seeing Tsuna's smile, and was able to take those extra steps to the door of his shared space.

"You can do t-this," Tsuna reassured. He took a deep breath and took the spare dorm key out from behind the left molding that framed the door. He fumbled putting the key inside, but eventually managed the task and swung the door open. He entered and let Tsuna take out the key and close the door behind them. It was less than three seconds later that Yamamoto emerged from the bedroom and froze upon seeing him.

"G-G-G...Gokudera!" The baseball idiot shouted, and Gokudera barely got out a 'yeah' before he was nearly knocked down in a forceful hug. Takeshi practically crushed him with the force. "Do you know how worried we've been? No one had seen heads nor tail of you in over two weeks and no one could get in touch with you! Kyouya had told the school to give you an emergency leave for a family matter, so you managed to not lose credits, and he looked like he knew something but wouldn't say. Where have you been?"

Takeshi somehow got all of that out in one breath, before pulling back and giving him a once over.

"I...had...some issues to...resolve. I'm sorry," Hayato winced, "I'm sorry...that I worried you."

"Well," Yamamoto smiled good-naturedly, "at least you look alright. Did you eat okay?"

"Yeah, I ate fine."

"Oh, who's this?" The baseball lover asked once he finally noticed Tsuna.

"This is Sawada Tsunayoshi. I had been staying with him," The silveret introduced, gently grasping Tsuna's hand even through all this.

"N-nice to m-meet y-you," Tsuna smiled and bowed slightly, "Y-Yamamoto Takeshi, ri-right?"

"Right!" Yamamoto either took no notice of their hands or didn't care, as he continued on, "Nice to meet you, Tsunayoshi!"

"Ju-just Tsuna i-is fine."

"Alright, Tsuna then. Gokudera, I'm going to call Hibari. Is that okay with you?"

"Yeah. That's okay," Hayato nodded and sat at the table with the brunet. Takeshi could be quite observant when he needed to be. His roommate nodded and disappeared back into the bedroom to make the call. In the meantime, Tsuna looked over to him.

"Y-you holding up a-alright?" He asked, brushing his thumb across the back of the silveret's hand.

"Y-yeah," The teen breathed, slumping in the chair. He felt exhausted even though all he had done was talk to the baseball idiot. "I'll be alright." Tsuna nodded, and they waited in silence. Yamamoto returned shortly after this, informed them that Hibari was on his way, and then joined them to wait in the quiet atmosphere.

Less than ten minutes later, Hibari barged in through the door. Gokudera stood and frowned as the skylark headed over to him, tonfas brandished.

"Herbivore," Kyouya said, obviously annoyed and angry. However, instead of being beaten to a bloody pulp, Gokudera received only one (albeit painful) hit to his head. Hibari stared at him unnervingly, then glanced at Tsuna briefly, before returning the gaze back to him. His tonfas vanished back into wherever they came from, and he held out a cellphone.

Hayato's cellphone.

Hayato cautiously took it from the other and sat back at the table. He knew the other probably found it back at the hideout, and instead of leaving it, destroying it, or even giving it to the police, he held onto it.

"Look at it, herbivore," Kyouya ordered, crossing his arms as he waited. Gokudera frowned, and unlocked the device.

His inbox and voice mail were full.

He swallowed, and began to scroll through the messages.

_'(From: The Baseball Idiot) Hey, Gokudera, where are you? It's been three hours since Hibari got super mad over whatever it was. Wherever you are, stay safe and come back soon!'_

_'(From: Annoying Woman) Gokudera! Where are you? You're late for work for over an hour now, desu! Haru is super worried, desu! Pick up!'_

_'(From: The Stupid Manager) Gokudera, is something wrong? You didn't show up for work at all today. Please call me when you get this!'_

_'(From: The Lawnhead) Octopus-head! Where extremely are you! It's been three extreme days and no one can extremely get in touch with you! Answer someone!'_

_'(From: Kurokawa) Hey, idiot. Why aren't you answering anyone? Your disappearance is worrisome for everyone.'_

_'(From: The Crybaby Cow) Bakadera! Where are you? Come back already! It's been four days since anyone's heard from you!'_

_'(From: Lawnhead's sister) Gokudera-kun, wherever you are, everyone hopes that you're safe. Please call someone soon and let them know you're alright. We're all worried, you know.'_

_'(From: Tsuna) Gokudera-kun, is everything alright? I tried calling you a few days ago, but it went straight to voice mail. You usually get back to me. Answer this when you get it, okay?'_

Gokudera stared, shell-shocked at all the text messages. They went on and on, the messages containing more and more worry. He suddenly felt as if there was a lump in his throat and he harshly swallowed. He didn't even realize his grip on Tsuna's hand had become painfully tight until he saw the brunet subtly wince. He immediately adjusted and shot an apologetic glance.

"The voice mail." He looked back up to meet Hibari's stern look. His hands shook as he started to play them through, and held the phone up to his ear.

_"Hey, Gokudera, it's Yamamoto. Look...it's been two days since you disappeared, and I'm getting really worried. Are you eating okay? Are you somewhere safe? You're not hurt, right? I...I really, really want you to come back. It's been weird in the dorm since you left, and Kyouya's getting more and more agitated. Please, even if you don't respond to this, just be safe. Come back. I'm your friend, you know that, right?"_

_"Gokudera, it's Dino. This is the second time you've missed work. I don't know what's wrong, but if you need time off, just give me a call. You haven't spoken to any of the workers, and we're all getting worried. Give me a call when you hear this, okay?"_

_"G-Gokudera-kun? I-It's Tsuna. Li-listen, I don't know where you are, but I-I hope you're alright. I ha-haven't seen you anywhere i-in school. Please be o-okay."_

_"Gokudera-kun, it's Kyoko. It's been a week since you never came to work. You haven't answered anyone's texts or calls and we really just want to know you're okay. Contact someone, please."_

_"Hahi! Gokudera, please call one of us, desu! How long are you going to disappear for without a word? Haru and everyone are really upset, you know!"_

_"Gokudera, it's Hana. I'm calling to tell you to stop being an idiot. Why are you not answering anyone? Everyone's worried...myself included. Just pick up the phone already, will you?"_

_"OCTOPUS HEAD! Where are you to the extreme! Kyoko and everyone are extremely worried about you! If you don't extremely show up soon, then I'm going to extremely hit you for worrying my baby sister!"_

_"Bakadera...please come back soon. It's been ten days. Everyone's waiting by the phone for any word from you. Please...Gokudera...answer someone."_

Hayato didn't even know he was crying until Tsuna had reached up to wipe some away. He could barely put the phone back onto the table.

He couldn't believe it.

People really did care about him. His co-workers had sent him so many messages. Yamamoto had been worried sick. Tsuna had even asked his cousin to find him.

Why...why did he even try to screw this up? Try to leave? How could he even think that for one second, no one cared about him.

"...I'm sorry," He whispered. It was all he could manage. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." He pressed the palm of his free hand onto his forehead, clenched his tearing eyes shut, and gripped the roots of his hair. He choked back a sob, aware of the surprised look from Takeshi and the worrisome look of Tsuna without even seeing them.

"We are going to visit the diner in an hour." Hibari stated, looking satisfied at this turn of events. The skylark turned and left, walking into Takeshi's room. The owner of the room glanced at Gokudera and then Tsuna, before giving a small nod to the brunet and following Hibari.

"...Gokudera-kun..." Tsuna called gently, reaching up and removing his hand in his hair. Tsuna firmly held onto that one too, "L-look at me, Gokudera-kun." It took him some effort to relax enough to actually open his emerald eyes and look at the other. "I-It's going to be o-okay."

"Yeah...I just never thought..." He looked at the phone. Tsuna nodded and smiled.

"You we-were never alone," The brunet stated, and Hayato now, truly believed that statement. Tsuna stood up and wrapped his arms around Hayato, who almost instantly hugged back, gripping the back of his hoodie tightly. Hayato rested his head in the crook of Tsuna's neck, and stifled another sob. "It's g-going to be okay."

For a moment, there was a silence, as if Gokudera didn't hear him, but then an unmistakeable, firm, yet quiet "...okay" was spoken, and Gokudera had a feeling it really was going to be.

* * *

Standing outside the diner, Gokudera felt nervous as he stood just at the entrance point. The diner was technically closed for the next hour to prepare for the dinner shift, but the door usually remained open when the next cooks came in for their shift.

"Herbivore, hurry up." Hibari stated.

"I'm going!" Gokudera instantly retorted, even though he hadn't taken a step. He glanced at Tsuna, who shot him a reassuring smile. Yamamoto behind him laughed. He swallowed and braced himself, grabbing the door handle and easily opening the door. The bell chimed at the movement as he entered and the others followed behind him.

Kyoko was wiping tables up ahead, but had her back to them. Gokudera cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, but we're currently clo-" Kyoko turned and her eyes widened, "Gokudera-kun!"

"...Hi," He shifted, feeling awkward.

"Gokudera-kun, I can't believe you're here! Where have you been? Are you alright? You never answered anyone at all!" Kyoko spoke quickly, running up to him and looking him over. Eventually she hugged him, to which he stiffened, but she pulled back soon enough.

"I-uh-" He stuttered.

"Kyoko, why are you talking so loud, desu?" Haru emerged from the back, and quickly saw the answer to the question. "Hahi! Gokudera! Where have you been, desu? Do you know how worried Haru and everyone was?" The brunette shouted, running over and embracing him. "You idiot! How dare you worry Haru like that!" She pulled back, and like her friend, looked him over.

"Did I hear Bakadera's name?" Lambo called, coming out from the same place as Haru. "B-B-Bakadera!" He exclaimed, once he saw the silveret. The cow ran over, nearly fell, and ran straight into him for a hug. Hayato stumbled but kept his ground.

That is, until Ryohei showed up.

"OCTOPUS HEAD!" was all the warning he got before he was tackle hugged along with Lambo onto the floor (Gokudera was half-expecting to be hit by the boxer after listening to the voice mail, but it must have been an empty threat). The wind was knocked out of him and he made an audible 'oof' noise when he crashed onto the floor. Lambo was sobbing messily onto his shirt, and Ryohei was shouting something incoherently in his ear.

"Guys...I can't...breathe!" He gasped, smacking the floor in desperation. Thankfully, Kyoko pulled Ryohei off of him, and he stood with Tsuna's help, though Lambo still clung to him. He glanced down and frowned at the younger teen. Hesitantly, he returned the hug to the other, just making him sob louder.

"Octopus head, where have you extremely been!" Ryohei asked loudly.

"Uh-" He managed to say, before Lambo interrupted,

"We were all worried sick."

"That's right Gokudera," Dino appeared out of nowhere, smiling; Hana stood next to him. "You should know better to make us worry."

"I...uh...I'm sorry." He couldn't bow with Lambo attached to him, so he settled for bowing his head. "I made you all worry about me and I never attempted to contact any of you. I...I really am sorry."

"Gokudera, we're all your friends, you know? Of course we'd worry." Kyoko smiled.

"You're such an idiot," Hana quipped, though it really had no bite to it.

"The important thing is, though, is that you're alright." Dino added. "I hope I have one of my best workers back now."

"...Y-yeah, you do." Hayato nodded after a pause.

"Extreme group hug!" Ryohei shouted, and somehow pulled them all together (excluding Hibari, Yamamoto, and Tsuna) and crushed Gokudera in the middle even after he exclaimed a 'no, wait!' Yamamoto laughed loudly over all the other chuckles of the workers. Glancing at Tsuna, Hayato could see his beaming smile, and really, he couldn't help one in return.

It was good to be home.

* * *

Gokudera nervously fixed his tie in the mirror, and exhaled loudly. He glanced over as the door opened; Tsuna came in with a neatly pressed matching suit.

"A-are you okay?" Tsuna asked and smiled, coming over. Gokudera dropped his hands down to his sides and let Tsuna fix the tie.

"Just a bit nervous," He replied, raking a hand through his hair.

"I-It'll be fine. We've d-done this before," The brunet smiled again, and patted the tie once he was done. "T-there," He nodded in satisfaction, bringing his head up to kiss the silveret. "Ready?"

"Yeah," Hayato said, assured after the kiss from his lover. It had been three and a half years since the events that led him to this point in his life. Time flied really quickly. "Let's go." Tsuna took his hand and led them out of the room, walking around those backstage who smiled and wished them good luck, and walked onto the curtain-hidden stage. They could both hear the audience chatting in anticipation. Hayato took a seat at the grand piano while Tsuna grabbed the microphone off the stand and moved it away.

The curtains began to part, and the chattering turned to murmuring, and ceased by the time the stage was fully revealed. Gokudera could spot Yamamoto, Hibari, and everyone else sitting in the front row with smiles on their faces (aside from Hibari, but that was to be expected). Tsuna glanced at him shortly, and so he nodded. He placed his hands on the smooth keys. Easily and with a small smile on his face, he began to play. It wasn't long after that Tsuna began to sing.

" _Though I am weak in running, though I have to repeat my study...Not rushing and carefree, to be healthy is the main point...No matter how easy, as long as I can clear it, it's fine, about a game too, not going to it is my life...10 years after or 20 years after, can we always spend it together? My important friends' faces are rising up to the blue sky no matter how many time..._ "

Gokudera swayed in time with his hands, a small smile gracing his lips. Never in a million years would he have thought that he and Tsuna would perform together. It was a dream come true one year ago, when someone offered them both a record deal. The agent wanted to bring back piano into music, giving it a more prominent role, not always in classical music either. Tsuna's voice accompanied the piano amazingly, and so they were brought in together. It wasn't long before they had gained success for their odd music selection of piano and little accompaniment of other instruments.

" _Even for the no-good me, the smiling you...I love it, I love it very much. I'll do it with my dying will and even though I am still no-good, I'll try hard so that you will smile again._ "

Tsuna smiled widely towards their friends. His older brother Giotto and Reborn were off towards the end of one row, and Gokudera had spotted his cousin, G., sitting next to Giotto. If he didn't know any better, he'd say the two of them were holding hands, but he didn't want to distract himself with a shocking revelation, so he filed the thought away for another time. The song soon came to an end, after a performance of two more songs, Gokudera stood to bow with Tsuna. With the motion, they heard the crowd cheering, but he could hear Takeshi's laugh and Ryohei's shouts the most, despite the audience's noise. Dino whistled whilst the girls clapped and laughed. Hibari remained silent and Lambo jumped up and cheered. Giotto was grinning and shouting, while G. and Reborn only smirked.

He smiled at Tsuna, who beamed back at him.

* * *

"We'd like to thank everyone for coming out here as we greatly appreciate the support. Please have a wonderful evening and continue to listen to us in the future."

Gokudera stepped off the small stage of the room with Tsuna, as people came up to greet them. The reception for their recent success had just begun. Thankfully enough, the number of people running up to them dwindled to a number where the two of them could head over to their friends and family.

"Hey guys!" Takeshi greeted as they came over to the table. "Great job tonight!"

"Extreme performance!" Ryohei echoed, and Hana (who had been sitting next to him, holding hands under the table), squeezed his hand harshly for the loud tone and murmured 'too loud'.

"T-thanks," Tsuna smiled. "Glad y-you liked it."

"Che, of course it was," Hayato snorted.

"Tsuna, fantastic work," Giotto smiled, "you too, Gokudera-kun."

"Thanks," He and Tsuna replied.

"Keep up the good work you two," Kyoko beamed and Haru readily agreed,

"You two are getting famous, desu! Work hard, desu!"

"Thank you b-both," Tsuna nodded his head.

"Ahh, I miss my favorite waiter!" Dino joked.

"But I'm right here," Lambo stated instantly, causing everyone to laugh.

"I'm sure you're his favorite as long as you're not crying over customers," Gokudera quipped, and the cow lover sputtered indignantly.

"Hayato, I'm glad you're doing something you love," G. spoke up.

"Yeah, me too," He replied, sharing a look and smile with Tsuna.

"Don't get cocky, you two," Reborn warned.

"W-we won't," Tsuna assured hurriedly. "R-really, we're ju-just glad we h-have supporters!"

Someone made a comment on Tsuna's low expectations, causing everyone to laugh again. Eventually, Tsuna and Gokudera had to go off to speak with their agent. On the way, they spoke to one another quietly.

"So, do Giotto and G. have a thing?" The silveret questioned.

"I-I think so," Tsuna flushed. "During the performance, th-they-"

"Yeah, I saw that," Hayato hummed, "well, good for them."

"Everyone deserves their own ha-happiness," Tsuna noted. He sent the brunet a smile and discreetly took his hand. The other blushed and smiled widely.

"Well, I've got mine."

And that's all he ever wanted.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Songs generously borrowed:  
> "Naive" by Lovers & Liars  
> "Rarabai (Lullaby)" by Utsuse Miho (English translation used)  
> "Tsuna Life" by Yukari Kokubun; Tsuna's seiyuu (Note: this song doesn't contain piano, but if you actually listen to it, you could easily substitute the instruments there with one. Also, English translation used)


End file.
